Chase just ran by and said that Aladdin was on channel 35. Only about four minutes in when they showed Jafar for the first time did I realize that he was batting for the other team. Driving on the wrong side of the road. Fanny bandit. Fruity bald guy, single well into his forties. The guys got a cape, enough said. Then Jon comes creeping around the corner in the dungeon that Aladdin gets tossed into. He's missing about the same amount of teeth that the guy at the Loveland Walmart was. Also, when was the last time anyone saw a fucking monkey in the middle of Iraq, they barely have goats for christ sake. I guess they needed a dynamic animal character to go along with the character of carpet. Is that really all they could come up with? How bout like "tassels"? or "fly-y"? I don't know something. One more critique of this awesome movie that defined so many of our childhoods. Genie comes out of the lamp and says that he's been in there for ten thousand years. Ten thousand years. Its the year 2009. I'm gonna put the age of Aladdin at somewhere around the year 700. This would put the creation of Genie somewhere during the 9th millennium BC. According to Wikipedia, around 9000 BC - "The first evidence of the keeping of sheep, in northern Iraq." This means I'm supposed to believe that the first people to domesticate sheep, which doesn't seem like that hard of a task, manufactured some sort of magical creature capable of granting any three wishes in the world. Bull shit Disney, do some god damn math next time you try to sell a movie to a bunch of nine year olds.
mp3: Kanye West vs Britney Spears - Touch 3 Skies (The White Panda Mash)
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