Celine Dion is a Handsome Woman

At some point between Jake throwing up Friday and Justice singing Because you loved me, there were things that happened. New News: balloon boy a publicity stunt,papa falcon said so. More new news: the garage has a layer of highlighter and goo on it. Goo still to be determined. Old news: Jon farted again. In regards to the party however, three things surprised me. First, there were no massive sex orgies. Come on people, we're all friends. Second, Justice kept his pants on, highly surprising. Third, nobody had a black light induced seizure, here's looking at you Eric. Sunday was the worst I've felt since leaving Vegas for the first time. It was the feeling of you'd rather take a bullet to the back of your head than to actually try and live any longer. I felt as bad as Jake looked after throwing up for two hours, balmy and sweaty. I felt as bad as Justice looks in general. Hey Justice you know why I know you're gay? You have two Celine Dion songs on your computer. Worse than that, you know the words to those songs. Somehow worse than that, you sound pretty good when you sing them.


Chromeo - Night By Night